EP 48 Importance of Mentorship in Community - Andrea Hood

After a decade of gathering women together for prayer, we are inspired to bring our words of encouragement to you. This is iRefresh. Welcome to iRefresh, where we're ordinary women who desire to do extraordinary things through the power of prayer in God's Word. We have changed our location, and we are actually here in Alabama, Colman, Alabama, and I have my friend Andrea Hood. I knew her first as bald as Hood. Welcome. Welcome. Thank you for having me. I'm excited. Well, you know, sometimes spontaneity is great, and I would love for our listeners, whether it's on our podcast or on YouTube, just to get familiar with who our listeners are. I know where we began, but give us a little bit of background about what God's been doing in your life and who you are. Okay. Well, my name is Andrea Ball Hood. I was born and raised in the church, literally. I was born the first night of a revival. Wow. My dad was a pastor, and he had to cancel revival service because my mama said that served him right. He should have never planned a revival when she was due. So I've spent my whole life on the pew. I've spent my whole life helping in the church. So that's really all I've ever known. And I'm thankful for that now. Now that I'm grown, I'm thankful for that. Growing up, I didn't always understand. But I am several generations in of ministers of the gospel. Both grandparents, both sides were ministers of the gospel. And so I've spent my life in the church. God gloriously helped me. He didn't just raise me or save me. He helped me because I always knew the truth. But it didn't always have its rightful place in my life. But when I grew up and I got to see who God really was and really have the relationship, He took over. He called me into ministry. I accepted the call at 17 to preach the gospel. I remember being in a service one night. My dad was preaching and I was sitting on the front row and the power of God just came so much on me. I just yelled out, send me. Right in the middle of the service. And it was, I don't even know if anybody else was impacted that night. But that night I realized that no matter what life looked like, I had to be in the kingdom. I had to be serving. So ever since then, that's what I've been doing. I'm married. I have four beautiful children. I have three girls and a boy. We at this point have three dogs and a bunch of puppies. So it's a lot of fun at our house. And they're adorable. She showed me pictures. They're so cute. I have Labradoodles. lab just like my lab shed that's a different yeah so they're a week old yesterday so we're having a lot of fun with that my husband i pastor a church it's a new work less than a year old and the name of your church upper room revival center so if you're in the alabama what area colman colman county is where we're at okay So you need to, but also online, you can listen to your messages too. Yes, we've just now started uploading our services online. So you can go to our website, UpperRoomRC.com, so you'll be able to find us there. We also have a page on Facebook. We don't go live yet, but we're considering that. But we do record so that you can hear the worship and the sermons each week. So, yeah. That's awesome. So actually, Andrea and I were introduced to each other by my friend, Laura Crocker. And so we get to hear about what God's been doing and how the two of them are doing some things together, not only in your church, but also in some other areas of ministry. Just an amazing outlet in working with women. But I would love for you just to share part of the journey, besides the calling in your life, what has God taken you through that's been really monumental to where you're at today. Well, it's kind of funny, but the worst season of my life was the best season of my life. It was the worst as far as emotionally. I went through a divorce. I married someone, and I loved him, but it just didn't work, and there's lots of details probably not appropriate for now. But I was in so much shame because I was raised in the church, and so many people in the church don't really understand divorce and how it affects people. And a lot of times the church don't know where they stand on divorce necessarily, So they're not even equipped a lot of times to walk with the person as they go through it, so it's very alone. It's confusing because I think we don't necessarily know what the Word says, but no matter what people are going through, we need to always have a place of love and trying to be understanding. Even if you don't understand something, you can still love someone and help just be present for people. That's what I missed out. I didn't really have, my parents tried their best to be there for me and to be a spiritual support, but it was just really tough. But during that time, I remember my mom was a minister of the gospel and she would go and preach different ministry conferences. And the first one I went to, I always went with her and was her armor bearer, but the first one that I went to after my divorce, she said, I want you to sing, because I'd always sing for her. And she said, if you feel that, I want you to give your testimony. And I just kind of got quiet and she said, I know it's hard, but you don't know who else is going through what you're going through and nothing's wasted in the kingdom. So that the second service I sang and I felt the release to tell a little bit what was going on in my life. And out of 40 women, four were exactly where I was. And that said so much to me because I was holding back because I was ashamed. I was holding back when... I was wanting people to help me when I was where I could help someone else. And so when I released, there was actually a release that came on the service and I spent the rest of the weekend ministering to those women and it released me. It helped me to get past the shame. So now I talk very openly about being divorced because sometimes people think that if they've ever been through something like that, that they automatically are unusable. Do you know the very fact, though, and I have to go to the point where when your mother, which I know Ginger is, and she's with the Lord with my mother, but the one thing is that you are willing to trust your mother to be willing to share even when you felt that shame, which what a way to overcome. It's to overcome no matter how you feel internally. You had enough trust in her, like, okay, I'll do it. But look at the reward. And how it helped you, even as you were willing to help someone else with your story, in turn, let God minister to you as well. Well, it's really pictured in the Bible because it says, let the older women teach the younger women. And through the years in ministry, I've had people say, why don't you say this to them? You could help them. And I would say to them, well, you need to pray for influence because I can only do what I can do. And there has been a section of the church that missed that. Wow. We haven't developed the relationships like we should have. So, and to be honest, don't be too upset with the new generation if you've not spent time with them because they don't know because you've not taught them. It's invested in us. And for us to be good ground, we've got to sow into other people. We have to invest in them. So I always have younger women around me. I'm always trying to do that because I may not understand everything. Right. But I can tell them what I know. But you know that you're right though. The fact that we're not willing to bridge the gap, the reason why we're not spending time with one another. And when we have those conversations, we begin to learn and understand each other. We don't have to understand everything, but we can have an appreciation of seeing where someone's from. Exactly. I mean, we learned that from the children of Israel. You know, God was saying, tell your children, tell your children's children. So they would never forget where you'd come from. And I think that's what I've learned, too, at my age of sometimes I don't know that the younger people want to hear my experiences. And yet I'm like, I finally learned something. Does anybody want to learn from my hair? Please. Like, please avoid my problems or mistakes I've made in my life. But what a great example you are is spending that time with them. Well, I have to. It's what God gave me. I'm older now. I just turned 40 this last year, and I know that sometimes that upsets women, but it has been very empowering to me because I feel like I've just reached this next season of my life where I get to be what I need to be for people. Right. I'm not hiding behind my youth anymore. I'm not hiding behind inexperience. Of course, I don't know at all, but I have a lot to offer. That's key, though. Yeah, and see, I think a lot of times women in the church, they feel inadequate or maybe they feel like they're uneducated. They've not been to seminary school or something silly like that. When what we do, just being a woman every day, following God is tremendous and it's worth teaching, or he wouldn't have said, teach the younger women. And when he lists out the things that teaches, things we do every day. Okay, so it's practical. It's very practical. And so, Andrea's making a real good point for us to realize that we are to just be able to share our experiences with them. And that's really mentoring. Absolutely. You're mentoring them and sometimes it's just basic life. It's not always the spiritual. There are some things that are practical that you might assume are common sense, but it's really someone on the other side, younger generations, they don't necessarily know. I've learned it with even just manners. I'm like, I grew up with a lot of manners, and I didn't realize I was being taught that. Some by example, and then some intentional by my mother. But I'm realizing we also have to be intentional to communicate clearly of the good qualities that are godly qualities, the virtues Right. We're virtuous women. Right. No, that's so good. But that is really practical. And I think what I like, too, when you're saying about we disqualify ourselves or we give excuses of why I can't. And yet God's intention for us is that He wants to use us now as we are while He's still refining us in that process. You know, it's funny that you said that because... one of the main women that impacted my life, I don't know her first name. I knew her as Sister Moore. I'm sure she's gone on to be the Lord because she was elderly. When we first moved to the church, my dad passed away from Prattville. I'd never had bedroom furniture. Okay. And it's not a big deal to some people, but to those who never had it, it's a big deal because we always lived in parsonages and they had prepared and she, searched the newspaper and found some used furniture, but she let me go and she let me decide if I liked it. I'm sorry, I'm crying, but I'll never forget that. Her hands were all crinkled up from arthritis and she had a big hump in her back. And she didn't have a lot to give. She wasn't very spiritually outspoken, but she saw a need and she met it. And she let me pick that out, and I'll never forget that as long as I live. So it could be something as simple as seeing a need and having a little extra to meet it. Or sometimes I'll say to, because we help women go through recovery, I'll say, you know, let's learn to cook. I've taken young women to the garden. I love to have a garden because if you ever want to hear from the Lord, watch something grow. That's true. God can just speak to you in the garden. But something simple like teaching someone how to can, you'd be amazed at what will come from your spirit as you begin to pour out of people. The very thing that they need somehow will come from you because God is good and He is gracious and He's never lacking. Exactly. And He uses us, so we're not lacking. So, yeah, so it's amazing. Just cooking. I've taught so much just through cooking. Yeah, you're like the lessons. You know, I remember, I have to go back too, is, you know, sometimes in those places where my mom was an amazing cook, is my sister usually did the cooking with her, and I would do the baking, or I'd do the cleanup. And I remember it was just as simple as I became a place where, when we were going through so many hard times, it was a time of cooking, and being in the kitchen where there were nuggets where it was very therapeutic because I became the clown of the family. And so when life was hard, we would be in the kitchen and you try to have to unload the day of stress and the things we were going through. And so our kitchen sink, there was a window right in front of it. Well, that became my camera. And so I would welcome my mother into the Dinky Diner. And we would, I would, all it was was a box of brownies. And I was very flamboyant about it. In a little bit of a showcaser. But began a dialogue with my mother while we were just making a batch of brownies. And I'm like, it was just so fun because laughter, you know, I'd be so dramatic about breaking the egg. Well, all of a sudden it went down the sink. And I didn't realize my mother was so stressed, like, we don't have many more eggs, you know. But the joy that came out of that time of cooking was so what we needed for the day, you know. So there are so many applications there. Absolutely. That you can use. And I think, especially if you have the gift of hospitality, Yes, that's a big one. I mean, you need to use those things in creative ways. You know, I like that you take everything as an opportunity to use. Everything. I mean, we pastor a church, and one of the best things that someone did for me in the past year is we were our doctor having babies, and I didn't really know what to do. You know, because I'd read it up and tried to make myself smart on Google. But a lady that I had went to church with before, I called her because I had a question, and she stopped everything and came over. Wow. And it's just something that simple as just being available. I've told people before, because I do a lot of women's services, you're going to have to open your home to people. You need to open your door, open your kitchen. You know, I remember growing up, and this is kind of a lost art, but I remember at least two or three Sundays a month, we went to a different person's house. Different families would have the pastor in and bless us just with a meal. And I remember that's how we build relationships with those families. And those people that had us on regularly, I still have a relationship with them 30 years later. Now that's a great idea. People are always, I've got to build my church, I've got to build relationships. It's real simple. My mom used to say, to build a church, you've got to preach the Word, you've got to pray, and you've got to eat together. So for as long as I can remember, we always had one Sunday night or one Sunday afternoon a month where we ate. And we do that at our church now, one Sunday a month. We're doing it this Sunday. We have a meal. It's potluck. It's nothing spectacular. But we sit down as a church together because that's what the New Testament church did. Exactly. And we're trying to kind of make it harder than it has to be. The kingdom is not hard. It's very easy. The way of the transgressor is hard. What we do is easy. What we do is love people and allow them in our life. But I have a family member, and she's not real comfortable with opening her home. And the closer she's gotten to God, the more she's opened her home up because the more she has to give. Where it used to stress her out and make her feel like she was out of her element, now it's not. She's full. And when you're full, you have to pour out. Exactly. And God will make opportunities where there's something simple like drinking coffee. You know, sometimes I say, stop by, let's have a cup of coffee. You're building a relationship and we need one another. And I think that that's been the gap in the church. We've forgotten that those little things are important. We need to do them. We need to love one another. I think we have to be bold enough to recognize that sometimes we think, well, they're going to be too busy. Like when I hear that from other people, friends, they'll say, well, I'm sure you're too busy. You know, even in a text, well, I hate to bother you. I'm like, it makes me very sad. Because we're never too busy to stop and pause, enjoy. I mean, part of it is just, it's refreshing to have that communion of fellowship with one another person. Because I feel like, like I had a friend who did something and we just went out and we rode scooters or whatever. That was so therapeutic, like just like that she was thoughtful to go and do something out of the ordinary. And it wasn't that long a period of time, but it was just intentionally going and doing something different. And it kind of took me out of my element of, you know, stressing myself over all my to-do lists. And you're right, it doesn't have to be complicated. Even in the church, I remember growing up, and we always had the potlucks, huh? Always. Yes, I love potlucks. You know, today you're like, well, but everybody's got so many food allergies and this and that. But I'm like, if you make enough variety, Just bring what your family can eat. Right. And then just tell your, if your child has an allergy, just eat from this. Yeah, you just bring what you know. And so there's never too many excuses where we can't overcome them because of the richness that comes out of that. Absolutely. You know, even, you know, back in the early centuries of our country, what happened? Everybody got together and they did a barn raising. Everybody got together. But the issue, and I'll try not to chase this rabbit, Lord help me, but we're too busy. Yes. My husband and I, we have an insurance agency, and we work from home. And we could do more, but we've regulated our life a certain way to be with our family. Yes. And a lot of people don't understand that. We don't play a lot of sports. We don't do a lot of things because if I'm too busy, I'm not going to be able to do that. I'm going to miss out. If I'm too concerned with what's important to the world, then I may miss out what's important to God. And when we simplify things, and I know that's a hard word and people don't like to hear it, but it's really important to simplify our life, build it around what's important to God, then He has opportunity to do in our life what He needs to do. But sometimes we're just too busy, we're too caught up. And that's why people say things like, I know you're busy, because they're busy. And And I understand that. But I think that's like the device of the enemy, though, too. And I have been on that journey of simplification. Because I know, even for me, when I feel like my mind is going too many places, I actually go in in my home. Of course, my family are like, what is she doing again? Because I'm like, it's like spring cleaning. I keep on like, OK, get rid of things and make life simpler. Because what it does for me, it clears my mind. Like when there's less clutter, less things in my home, and it's in order and it's cleaned up, I'm like, that does something to my mental capacity of when I go back and I sit down, I need to do some work. I actually feel a lot better. I feel like my mind is now free to be creative. And if I have to write or communicate with people, I'm in a better, happier place. And so simplification, I think, is good. And I think what you also said is that priority, your family, that priority that we take that time to be intentional with our children and our Even our spouses, having that time, even when people are like, well, I don't have funds or I can't do that, you don't have to go somewhere. I grew up and you just go outside. You don't have to be doing, you don't have to go watch a movie or whatever. That communication amongst each other. Sitting down and eating a meal. Exactly. Everyone at the same time. Sitting around the table. And I'll tell you, my family loves this. This might sound a little silly, but we'll make a little bonfire. And we roast marshmallows around the fire and we talk. Yes. And they're getting to the age now. My oldest is 14. My youngest just turned 9. Of course, our conversations have changed, but we have a small window where those conversations won't be as important to them as they are now. So it may be something like a fire. It may be something like baking cookies. That's a big highlight. Once a month we sit down and we bake cookies and we decorate them, and there's stuff everywhere, and there's icing, and it's a lot to clean up. But it's our time, and it's important because if I, what's the word say, if I win the whole world, right, and lose our own soul, then... So my family has to be important. And I believe, and there'll be some people that will feel a lot of condemnation when I said that. Please don't feel condemnation. Because if God is asking you to simplify, if He's asking you to prioritize, He never asks us to do something. He does not prepare us and give us the ability to do. See, my God, what He starts, He finishes. So if He has started that work in you, then He's going to walk alongside you until it's completed. He's not going to start you with something and say, good luck, I hope you figure this out. He's going to say, let's walk together. Let's do this because it's important for you. That's good. You're exactly right. Thank you for clarifying too. It's never a condemnation. I think our hearts in general for each of us is, God probably prompts us of things that we need to maybe bring back into order or we prioritize ourselves. I think a lot of times is now I've gotten to where I use a calendar again and planner and make sure I know what my priorities are. Because I want to, I know as my sons are actually getting ready to want to get married, another one to go on to film school, is I'm like, I only have now a short window where they're in my home and I don't want to miss my opportunity. Just enjoy them. and to have great memories, I think with our friendships too. Absolutely. Is, you know, asking God every day, like, God, what are we to do? Where can we be a blessing to someone? And sow a seed of time. Or depending on what your talents or giftings are, you know, what is it that God, what is it in my hands? You know, the woman was like, you know, God, you know, I was Elijah talking about what is in your hand. He said, what do you have? Yeah. What is it? He's not asking you to do something you don't have, you know, whether it's time and funds or whatever. He's just asking, what do you have? And are you willing to share it? I'm willing to give it. And this past Wednesday, I actually ministered on two are better than one and the importance of accountability. So if you'll have the right people in your life, if there's correction that's needed, they'll be able to say, you know, I'm a little concerned because you're real busy lately. I'm a little concerned because, you know, we had a worship night and you weren't there. Is everything okay? There you go. We walk together. We have relationship together. And we get to grow together. You know, the one scripture that I read out of it said that two is better than one because if one fail and he was alone, there would be no one to pick him up. If he was attacked, there would be no one to defend him. So it gives us that basis. And for women, friendship is so important. So if you've not made time for people, then... that may be part of the issue. My mom always said, to have a friend, you must be a friend. And I know that that's just a common thing, but really it is. Make time and give people the ability to say things like, hey, I have a friend, my cousin, she's like a sister to me, but one time I threatened one of my kids, you better not do that again. And then I didn't do what I said I was gonna do. And she said, that's not what you said. And it kind of stung a little bit at first. And then I realized that she was right. And God gave her to me. And I need her. So I then corrected my mistake. I did exactly what I said I was going to do. And I thanked her. And she's my greatest source of friendship. And, you know, because we adopted our children, so I went from zero to four all at one time. And most people would have been like, I cannot believe she said that to me. But God knew I needed help. And so when God sends you help, be sure that your heart is very open to receive the help that you're given. Because if you're strong-natured like I am, I'm not always... I can see another, but I can't always see them myself. I needed someone to be able to say, hey, no, wait a minute. This needs a little work. And I received that. And because of that, not only did I get the help I needed with my children and this new adventure I was on, but also I gained a lifelong friend. Because I trust her and she trusts me. And if it's hard, it's hard for us together. We work together. If it's good, we're on the mountaintop together. Well, you celebrate, which is important. And I'm healthier and she's healthier. Right. You're better together. Absolutely. Two are better than one. Exactly. We need one another. And as the church, I encourage you, don't walk this road alone. You're not created to walk alone. Even God said it's not good for him to be alone. And we are thankful for marriage and that companionship. But it's not good for any of us to be alone. We need one another. You need the support of your church. If you don't have a home church, find one. Be a part of something because we need that support system. And it's good to lock arms. It's good to grow together. It's good to build together. It's a great experience because not only are you building and growing, but you're enjoying the, and you're sharing the load. Exactly. So many people say, I'm so tired, I'm so overwhelmed. Well, you're probably carrying the load by yourself. So let's walk arms and get the help we need. So now that's really the power of love. Okay, Andrew has shared so many nuggets. I would advise you to listen a few times because so many great truths. And I'm not sure, can we try to highlight, like, what are some of the great nuggets we want to pull through to just remind people about? One is, really, it's community. It's being in the church. Yes. It's fellowship. It's using. It's mentoring. And it's giving out of just what you have. Right. Don't fall to shame. That's it. Very good. That's a powerful one. Yeah, because the shame freezes us up and prohibits what God intended for us to do. And then we lose that connectivity. Then we go through a lonely season. An unnecessary lonely season. Right. And that's not God's intention. No. So, you know, wow, there are so many great just highlighting the importance that, you know, we as the body of Christ, we're all on the body of Christ. And that he desires for us to have that fellowship where we keep each other accountable. But not to condemn, but to love, celebrate each other. And, you know, I would love to hear even some of your ideas that you have. When you started listening to some of the examples of things you did, even for the family, of having the connecting within your own family, maybe you have some of those suggestions. We would love to hear from you. So be sure to subscribe to our podcast or if you're on YouTube to subscribe so you don't miss an episode. And make some comments below or share with us of things that you've done in your family that has united you as well, even people within your church, friends, because God desires for us to help each other to be strong in him. Until then, we trust that you will be encouraged and inspired and to go change the world where God's called you.